Where's The Good Porn?

It used to be that porn was something to get excited about, even perhaps aroused.  The sight of a ladies shoulder would be enough to bring off a man many years ago, then the Heff brought it all to a whole new level, with the wonderful simplicity of making a girl get starkers and putting some bunny ears on her.  Genius!

The age of betamax brought pornographic films to a much wider audience and left many homes with an alternative to watching Songs of Praise when granny visited on Sundays.

However, now anyone who drops their pants thinks they can be a porn star, and we've had enough.  We want a return to the high quality smut of yore.  Jewell , you're not a porn star, you're barely a fucking football manager.  Stop it.

If you have sex tapes of any football managers don't email them to us.
Unless they feature Big Ron.