Olympic Heroes
Aren't the Olympics just class? Loads of grown men and women trying to run fast, jump high and not get caught taking
drugs. Everyone knows the first ancient Olympics were held at Stonehenge and it's about time they were held in Blighty
again. After all the British team has a great Olympic history.
Eddie "The Eagle" Edwards
Gold medal for being a twat. We're surprised nobody tried to shoot him when he was in the air, but he probably wasn't actually in the air long enough.
Ben Ainslie
One man and his boat. Bet he couldn't go round the world in it.
Amir Khan
Do you want to punch the wee fucker too?
Audley Harrison
Continues a proud heritage of big useless plodders.
Mary Peters
Greatest man to ever win gold.
Paula "Marathon Man" Radcliffe
She invented the phrase, "It's the taking part that counts." Sorry no medal for that love.
Leslie Law
Horse riding toffs can play in the Olympics too. Why get off your fat arse when a horse can do all the work? Brilliant!
Kelly Holmes
Disgraced her country's proud heritage by actually winning not one but two gold medals. Greedy bitch.
Alain Baxter
Won a medal in the winter Olympics, but had to give it back after failing a drugs test. Said he just took some cough medicine but everyone knows crack cocaine's no good for a cold.
If you're an Olympic Hero email us at notfuckinglikely@randomshite.co.uk
and we'll immortalise you on this page.
If you're Seb Coe email us at fuckwit@randomshite.co.uk
and we'll come shit on your doorstep.
