London Town Olympic Logo

Hullabaloo central has had a busy week with the revelation by the London Town Olympic Committee that they had let a child make the new logo out of sticklebricks (none of that Lego shite for Lady Holmes). If it had been at the Maze it would have been a petrol bomb, and no fucker would have said boo. But the English have made a mess of this one.

Our first thought was, "We could have done better than that," our second thought was, "I wish I hadn't just pissed myself." So we thought about redesigning it, but we couldn't be arsed. Then we thought of letting you redesign it, but you've all got as much artistic talent as Damien Hurst. Then every bastard started to run competitions to redesign it. So we knew our offices were bugged.

But we had to do something, if only to stop the arthritis from permanently destroying our joints, so we've decided to tackle the real problem and redesign that bastion of bastardness - Seb Coe:

New brain - William Hague. His old one is clearly wired wrong since Hague put his "big Willy judo death grip" on him.
New legs – Steve Cram's right on for his left, Steve Ovett's left for his right. Admit it, it'll be fun watching him fall over.
New arms - Steve Redgrave, more Olympic medals than hot breakfasts, so he'll be able to row out of the Olympic sized shit creek that 2012 will surely be looking like come 2011.
New bladder – Seb can spout a quare amount of pish, but nobody spouts pish like Sepp Blatter, so he gets Sepp Blatter's bladder to help him slabber better.
New Labour – no thanks.

If you would like to contribute a body part to our Frankensebcoe,
please email it to itshouldhavebeenatthemaze@randomshite.co.uk