Keane - The Discipliner


Keano Roy "I'll Put Manners in You Boy" Keane has shown his less-than-soft side once again by telling Liam Miller to, "get the fuck out," for being late.  We salute him for this because Liam Miller is for fuck all, although he's better than Clinton Morrison, but then again so is that road kill we saw this morning.  This isn’t a one off for Keano, he made that other toolbag apologise to his neighbour for playing his Scooter tapes too loud.

We've got into the Estádio da Light to find out some of the other rules he has in place - it was easy, security at Sunderland is about as tight as their defence.

  • Anyone who doesn’t tie a proper knot in their tie has to share a room with Dwight Yorke on away games.
  • Anyone who doesn’t finish all their dinner has to do laps while giving Reid a piggyback while he finishes their dinner.
  • Anyone who says anything nice about Alfe Inge Haaland gets beheaded.
  • Ban on Just for Men’s beard products.
  • No English cunts who aren’t even Irish. Stick that up your bollocks.
  • No prawn sandwiches.
  • Never talk to the media unless walking a dog.
  • Anyone who’s past it can fuck off to Celtic.

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