How To Save The BBC
So despite the BBC getting a guaranteed income for many years to come, an income
that is going up, they have suddenly decided they need to make less programmes and
sack more staff. Where did all the money go? Did they invest it all in
Northern Rock? Despite us, like them, not having a clue what’s going on,
we’ve some helpful suggestions for ways Auntie Beeb can tighten her purse strings
in the coming years:
- Ban Nolan from the staff canteen.
- Have a phone vote at 1p a go. The question: Should Garth Crooks be shot? It will raise millions instantly.
- Sack one of either Big Cook or Little Cook. Then sack the other.
- Celebdaq. Seriously lads?
- Don’t pay for the rights to show England play in the Euro.... oh wait. Never mind.
- Scrap that shit bloody programme where Steven Watson plays golf with some cunt.
- BBC Wales? Fuck BBC Wales.
- Peter Serafinowicz should be paying to be on TV, not the other way around.
- Put Fearne Cotton on more shows. No money saving value, but she's a foxy beatch.
- Sack Hugo Duncan and ask for all his wages back.
- Have Radio 5 commentators use their mobile phones to commentate from England matches in the former Eastern Bloc. Oh, wait, you're already doing that. Good.
- Wonothan Woss's wages could be cut. Pay him what he's worth. Fuck all.
- Make Noel Thompson take the bus instead of taxis at £12.50 a go.
If you'd like to help us help the BBC, send £135.50 to
BBC-poll-tax@randomshite.co.uk
