Don't Ban Fox Hunting
At Random Shite we say don't ban fox
hunting! We say get behind a campaign not only to keep fox hunting, but to legalise cock fighting,
badger baiting and trout tickling! If the last 35 years have taught us nothing (and they haven't) then
it's that as long as the law is even handed in it's injustice, then it is fair on everyone. Unfortunately
we realise this is unlikely, so we have a few alternative to fox hunting:
- Fox Hunt - Chase Neil Fox with hounds until he is torn limb from limb.
- Cox Hunt - Throw a midget non-rower into a boat without his burley mates and see how far he can get when chased through the countryside.
- Fax Hunt - Hide a fax somewhere on a large estate with details of the law society Christmas ball on it. First to find it wins a knighthood.
- Box Hunt - Put a fox in a box and throw it off a bridge. It's cruel, but there's no specific law against it yet. Also controls the fox population.
- Knox Hunt - Put Coronation Street's Barbra Knox in a box and throw her off a bridge.
- Socks Hunt - Hide a sausage in a sock and tie it to a fox and chase it over hills and dales. If the hounds accidentally kill the fox in the process, so be it. Also controls the sausage population.
- Woks Hunt - Chase Ken Hom through the countryside as he attempts to sauté a duck with a side dish of noodles and asparagus.
- Fox Punt - Gather a load of the lads together and see if you can kick a fox further than the earl of Twaterslea.
Alternatively, if none of these can be granted can we please have a final hunt across the whole country where Kate Hoey
is chased by a crowd of people on horses, to be caught and bananas inserted in as many parts of her body as can be found.
Email us with your support or fox hunting alternatives
tally-ho@randomshite.co.uk
