NI Space Shuttle
Not
to be outdone by those know it alls at NASA, our own boffins at the Northern Ireland Space Agency (NISA) will
today launch their own space shuttle "Hostility" into space. The shuttle is scheduled to investigate how
Catholics and Protestant react to each other in a zero-gravity environment.
The project brings together experts from both the University of Ulster and a real University, Queen's, in a
cross community project jointly funded by Spar and the EU bottomless pit Programme for Peace
and Reconciliation. Local government representatives have stated that the project will be well worth diverting
funds from education, since the schools are off anyway.
The leader of the team who have developed the shuttle has said the design is quite simple. "It will be
fuelled at lift-off by a large tank of hot air supplied by local politicians and as it enters orbit this tank will
be jettisoned and the shuttle will then be powered by cheap diesel smuggled across the border. Sure it's
hardly rocket science."
Martin McGuinness, Iris Robinson and Reg Empey pictured as "Hostility" waits for launch.
The launch time may be delayed as negotiations with local residents unhappy about the launch are continuing, but
not face to face obviously. A spokesman said, "We're happy enough with the trajectory planned for take-off,
but on the return route for landing it passes right over our houses and that's just not on!"
If the space mission is successful there are a number of future projects in the pipeline. These include trying
to hook up some free Sky and solving the age old mystery, can Stephen Nolan be seen from space?
The whole event can be seen live by looking out your window.
Send your suggestions for space related research to
if-a-bear-shits-in-space-can-anyone-hear-it@randomshite.co.uk
